Using Safewords

A friend that I have never played with before said yellow in the middle of a scene recently. Like any good player, I stopped and checked in. She told me what was wrong and we fixed it. Done and done, no harm no fowl… We continued to play and at the end during our aftercare she apologized for calling yellow during the scene and held me tighter. I was blown away by this and told her never to be sorry for that.

A safe word is called a safe word for a reason – its so that the Dom knows that his sub isn’t going to get hurt.

Using it is a sign of sanity and common sense, a way to let the Dom know that something is wrong during a scene.

Stop, Fix it, No harm done, No foul

A sub must be able to communicate that something is wrong during a scene, a cramp or a circulation problem or a bottom that can take no more punishment. If you’re new to a Dom who doesn’t know you then every safe word should be treated as RED because they know nothing about the sub and they have no clue about their emotional state or emotional triggers.

There’s only ever one excuse for not obeying a RED, and that is if the DOM is a perfect mindreader and is omnipotent and all powerful.

If a Dom punishes you for a Safe word or uses your insecurities to poke fun at you – then Run! and Don’t see the Dom again.

Favourite Safe Words – be free to email me with yours
RED
BLACK
YELLOW
SAFE
Chocolate Coffee – two essential ingredients for any Aftercare – but never shouted together.