Before You Begin
Before you lay a hand on your partner, talk about spanking.
Talk about your spankee’s experience (or non-experience) with spanking.
Ask about her about her likes and dislikes and what her pain thresholds are.
If you’ve never spanked during sexual play, let your partner know and take things slow.
Use and honor “Slow down,” “No,” “Stop” and safe words.
Warm Up – Start by gently stroking the arse and the back of the upper legs with your hand makes the spankee feel cared for and gets the blood flow going. Making your sub/partner feel relaxed and subdued is elemental in building trust for how things will ensue.
Start off Slow: Once your partner falls into a comfort zone, give a quick smack. At the beginning, use more soft touches than spanks. It’s even better when your soft touches and spanks are unpredictable. The unexpected is key to the ying-yang/pain-pleasure mindmeld and to gradually build up the intensity and frequency of your spanks and never increase by more than 1/4 of the previous spank.
Spanking Hands-on Tutorial: Use the meatier parts of her ass or back of her legs and pull back quickly. Flick your wrist as if you’re cracking a whip. Cupping your hand with your fingers together gives the effect of a spanking but also has a bit of a caress to it and as you increase intensity, then use a flat palm with your fingers slightly apart as this will give more intensity as well as leaving a sting and red mark (it’s noisier too).
Rotate: Don’t spank the same spot over and over because you will simply create bruises. Alternate between cheeks. Also spank the hips, try the sides of her butt, or the top of her thighs. An occasional and very gentle tap to the pussy can leave a delightful jolt, too, but only once the endorphins are flowing. Spanking isn’t just all about the arse and you can use anal play while you’re spankingif your partner’s into that. Alternate play between spanking, pussy play, fingerplays, dildo and vibrator and don’t forget the boobs so remember to pinch a nipple periodically.
Heavy Handed: If her breathing starts getting heavier or she appears to be pre-orgasmic, step up intensity but remember to watch her sounds and let her movements guide you. “Ouch!” immediately followed by an “Oooh” is good!
Talk: Ask how your sub is feeling. Sometimes spankees won’t say – they think they have to endure pain to get pleasure – others don’t talk! Remember to tease her by touches near her pussy and the upper insides of her thighs. Gliding your finger tip along the top of her ass crack to the small of her back will send tingles and shivers throughout her body and down to her very core as can sliding you fingers from clitoris to anus via the pussy and asshole.
Daring her to come while she’s getting spanked can sometimes work too!
Spanking during hardcore fucking causes her vaginal walls clamp around your cock and give her an orgasmic jolt but make sure she’s ready as otherwise it will kill her mood.
Don’t be surprised if the Master decides when he’s had enough, spanking is hard work on the hands!